Political Fist-Fight Leaves Canada Enthralled!


We seem to be in a bit of a doldrums when it comes to combat sports news these days.

Oh sure, there was the Bellator welterweight season opener on Friday, which was the usual brand of downright exciting with a dash of puzzling (what was Chris Lozano’s gameplan, anyways?) I’ve come to expect from Bellator tourney fights.

And there were two flavors of “Ultimate Fighter” for fans to choose from this week, so if you like your fights served up in a thick reality TV sauce, you were in luck. Al Iaquinta vs. Miles Jury especially was the sort of sloppy, passionate, hell-bent-for-leather fight that reminds you why you started watching “Big Brother with no girls and WAY more punching” in the first place.

And there was professional wrestling, the bastard step-father (or is that step-son?) of MMA that we all claim to revile, but can’t stop talking about. I didn’t watch Wrestlemania personally (remind me why I EVER bought PPV’s on a Sunday night again?) but I did see that The Rock “beat” John Cena in the main event. So allow me this moment to issue a hearty IN YOUR FACE CHILDREN OF TODAY, THE WRESTLERS I GREW UP WATCHING ARE WAYYYY BETTER THAN THE WRESTLERS YOU GREW UP WATCHING!

Then there was Canada.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m sure plenty of Canucks were tuned in to Bellator/TUF/Wrestlemania – us polite, pacifist, socialist Canadians have always been HUGE fans of MMA/pro ‘rasslin/all combat sports for some strange reason. But in the Great White North, the “main event” this weekend was undoubtedly the highly anticipated boxing match that went down Friday night in an Ottawa (that’s our capital…no seriously, it is) hotel.

In the blue corner: Fighting out of Repentigny, Quebec. This man is a Shotokan Karate black belt and a longtime member of the Canadian Navy. He stands five feet, ten inches tall, and weighs in at 183 pounds. He has an electoral record of three wins, no losses, and one Senate appointment. Ladies and gentlemen, he is the third youngest senator in Canadian history…

…Patrick “Guaranteed KO” Brazeau (note: not his actual nickname)!!!!!

And in the red corner: Fighting out of Montreal, Quebec. This man is a boxer with over 20 years experience and no professional record. He stands six feet, two inches tall and weighs in at 175 pounds. This man is a school teacher, an actor, and son of a Canadian icon. He is undefeated as a politician with two wins and a current seat in the House of Commons. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the future of Canadian politics…

…Justin “Nowhere to Go” Trudeau (again, just added that cause I’m a sucker for corny, phonetically-correct fighter handles)!!!!!!

Yes folks. This past Friday night two Canadian politicians – one of whom is viewed as a possible future candidate for Prime Minister – threw down in a real, non-worked boxing match. Three, two-minute rounds of politicians beating the crap out of each other for a good cause (proceeds from the match went to support the Ottawa Regional Cancer Foundation).

And believe me when I say that in my home and native land, this thing got some big time coverage. The week before the fight, I saw folks who couldn’t pick Jon Jones out of a lineup or even know who “Pretty Boy Floyd” was talking excitedly about this “fight”. There were betting lines on the fight (Brazeau was heavily favored due to his size and martial arts experience), the weigh-ins were given lead-story coverage, and the fight itself was analyzed like it was a world title prize-fight.

The Canadian press even called it “The Thrilla on the Hilla” with “The Hill” being a reference, as it is in the U.S, to the legislative house of government.

Yeah, that’s ridiculous on it’s face – meaning it’s awesome, and you should all be jealous that our country is so economically stable and crime-free that we talk about PR stunt boxing matches as headline news.

And finally, the actual fight – short as it was – played out in a classic fashion we’ve seen so many times in boxing. Brazeau came out hard the first round, both the better boxer and the harder hitter, and batted Trudeau around the ring. Then he got tired. Trudeau took over in the latter rounds, eventually getting a TKO in the third round as Brazeau just turtled up and took shots.

Politicians beating each other bloody for a good cause? Welcome to Friday nights in the land of hockey, beer, beautiful women and more hockey (and more beer).

God, I love my country.

22 Responses to “ Political Fist-Fight Leaves Canada Enthralled! ”

  1. Jamie Locke says:

    God keep our land, glorious and free!

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  2. Don't Call Me Leon says:

    And full of combat sports!

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  3. Don't Call Me Leon says:

    I wonder if any politicians want to try their hands at MMA, I know a few MP’s I’d like to Tap Out!!!

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  5. Jamie Locke says:

    I would totally throw down with Jean-Pierre Blackburn. But he’s retired now…

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  6. Donald Duck says:

    I was impressed with Justin’s fight, he settled down nicely and outside of wearing too many of Brazeu’s jabs did a good job of earning the stoppage.


    PS – Rumor is Justin was a bit of a gym rat back in the day after his dad signed him and the boys up for boxing. He did a good job of keeping his right tucked to his jaw during some of the early exchanges. I had to do a double take too cause at first glance it looked like Lamarche in his corner.

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  7. harry balls says:

    this was much better than i thought it was gonna be, and i was surprised by the outcome. props to both of these guys for getting it done.

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  8. Robin Black says:

    Trudeau has my vote.

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  9. Don't Call Me Leon says:

    Oh I see Robin Black is a LIBERAL, LOL!

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  10. Priest says:

    Congrats to Justin

    @ Don’t Call Me Leon: There’s one that i want to put in a kimora, and snap his arm, and them using the Pride rules, kick him in his head while he’s down.

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  11. Tyler Davis says:

    Justin had some good clean boxing. Nice jabs and right straights in the second and third. Really impressed with the fight

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  12. Elton Hobson says:

    I said in the article that Brazeau was the better boxer – but watching that fight again, I’m not so sure.

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  13. Elton Hobson says:

    Also @Don’t Call Me Leon…maybe he’s not Liberal, he’s just voting for the guy who won…come to think of it, this would be a great addition to our political system. Imagine if every election was settled with a fight instead of vote? In that case…well, Stephen Harper probably would have won either way, since I don’t see any of the previous field of candidates beating him in a fist-fight.

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  14. Priest says:

    @ Elton Hobson: i’m pretty sure that justin would put it on stephen harper when it comes to a fist fight

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  15. Robin Black says:

    I’m for legalizing marijuana and gay marriage and I think the rich should be taxed way more.

    Does that make me a liberal?

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  16. Robin Black says:

    I know I’m not a Republican.

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  17. Elton Hobson says:

    @Robin no sir…it makes you Canadian :p

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  18. harry balls says:

    Layton before he got sick was a beast. I used to serve him at a place just down from parliament hill , and i will tell you the guy was jacked. He liked to lift apparently. I dunno if he could scrap.
    I heard PET had the boys enrolled in boxing as youngsters.
    I’m for legalizing weed and a lotta other stuff. I guess i lean towards libertarian (I want the right to be left alone, the right for people to fail, and the right to not join a union), but i can’t go the whole distance. Loves me some free health care haha.

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  19. Elton Hobson says:

    Yeah I meant the previous candidates (Harper, Layton, Iggy, Giles). Of those cats, I see Harper pulling it out. Sans cancer, yeah I agree Layton has it wrapped.

    And yeah, Justin would open a bigger can of whoopa** on Harper than his old man oppened on the FLQ.

    Also, can’t believe we’re talking about hypothetical PM candidate fights on an MMA site :p. This place grows on me by the day…

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  20. Don't Call Me Leon says:

    Well in BC it’s a bit messy! Liberals aren’t doing so hot and it looks like the masses are seeing NDP but forgetting what they were like before the Liberals were voted in! Really we could be screwed no matter what so maybe vote the Green Party! I don’t even no which party is down for having a province wide commission to help MMA!

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  21. Urijah Cruz says:

    Who wins? Chretien vs Mulroney?

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